tales of the dragonborn 1: execution

[Flip Flapper]

ok first of i want to point out this is a comedy series and i plan to do one on the side named "slife of madness" (in that one the champion of cyrodil a.k.a sheogorath is the protagonist) in this one it is about the dragonborn in a more comedic way, i will usually stick to sorce material but i will occasionally go against it just becuse i think it would be more fun that way, now lets begin and i hope you enjoy
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Our hero wakes up after a long night of drinking and partying near the border to skyrim with a headache, he finds out that he is on board a carriage and one of the other prisoners suddenly starts speaking to him
"Hello! my name is Ralof and you should totally help our revolution cause you do not need to be a nord to fight for skyrims freedo meven if we are douchebags to every one who isnt one!"
Our hero is very confused by this and starts asking questions that should be obvious like "Who is the guy with the gag" and "Who are the stormcloacks?" and "What is the empire doing in skyrim?"
After about and hour of carriage riding and talking they arrive in the small fortress known as helgen where the execution is about to happen, a lot of people who have lifes and totally wont die in a dragon attack live there, wow they sure look alive, wonder what there is to kill some time before the execution? the children are especially lively, good thing they wont get orphaned soon, it sure is nice to know happy lifes like this will countinue to exist without any complications at all, and good that the rebellion is about to be over so peace will be brought back.
The imperial calls out your name and then your sent to the line, they ask our hero what is name is and he suddenly starts changing aperance untill he is satisified, this power will come in handy but suddenly our hero forgot how to use it, he is also sent to the line of executionee´s.
They start praying but apperently one of the stormcloaks has a busy schedule and wants to get executed immediatly, the imperials send his ehad flyin and a fountain of blood who just looks ridiculous comes out of his neck, they randomly calls up our hero.
"Wait why do we even stand in a line if you just take whoever you want!?!?!? Also why didnt you kill Ulfric first to completely anhialate this uprising in case i dont know a dragon come and interupts the execution or something?"
"Shut up and get over here nord in rags"
"I have a name!"
"Whatever"
Our hero walks up and drops the soap and is then pushed down, they are about to execute him when a dragon arrive and start killing everyone making so that all of the important stormcloacks and empire characters are the only one´s who make it out alive (also our hero and one kid) the dragonborn followed and empire soldier named Hadvar who had the exact same personallity as Ralof and ended up in riverwood with Hadvar´s nice uncle, there is also a relative to Ralof in the village and a couple of other people including 2 children.

To be countinued
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Sorry but i have more funny ideas for the future, you´ll see one day i hope